My sanity has crumbled
by Chi-Chi's Poptart
Summary: I was just tired and bored and wrote this. Pure crack. Read at your own risk. Contains many things besides Harry Potter and Hetalia. Some Nyo. T to be safe.


**So, I suffer from insomnia in the winter sometimes, and I'm also sick, so I decided to make the best of getting up early and write y'all a crack fic!**

**(No audience)**

**Guys?**

**Warning: Contains mild cursing, some crude humor, and strangeness… Some spoilers as well, so be prepared.**

Hogwarts was fighting its epic battle against Voldemort. Mrs. Weasely was defending her children, Remus was on the verge of being overwhelmed, Kingsley was doing the same thing, but he felt super confident because he put on some sunglasses. Aw, yeah.

The Golden Trio was busy throwing carrots at Death Eaters from the banister, and coloring books were flying through the air. All hope seemed lost, for the coloring book had pages that were as sharp as kunai and effortlessly sliced through the carrots, when a voice rang out.

Dumbledore's ghost appeared out of the floor, and raised his wand saying, "I have sent party invitations to every fandom! You shall not pass, Tom Riddle!"

And with that, he disappeared. Everything went to heck. The doorbell rang and hundreds of different fandoms arrived, including, but not limited to, Sherlockverse, Whoverse, Hetaverse, Mochiverse, Nekoverse, Clannadverse, the Clannadverse with the doll, Furubaverse, Amestris, and Equestria.

Well, immediately, Pinkie Pie got up and yelled, "PARTY!" and proceeded to throw cake batter everywhere with the party cannon.

Voldy became so angry, that the cake batter covering him got cooked, and he popped out of it like those cakes with the dudes inside. Everybody cheered. "Pie!" Pies fell from the sky. Calvin rejoiced, now getting the slice of pie he was refused at dinner.

In honor of his happiness, Winnie the Pooh arranged for a ballet which included, but again, was not limited to, the Baltics, the Mo!Baltics, the Neko!Baltics, Alphonse, Caesar Flickerman, Spike, Luna Lovegood, Tamaki and the twins, and whathisface. ("He was the greatest of all," sobbed Bender.)

Ayame stood up suddenly from his seat in the audience. "This has inspired me to make… CHOCOLATE MILK!" and gave everyone chocolate milk. Ed threw his on the floor, asked Mine to hug him (Which she did), and tossed him in a freezer.

Unfortunately, Nijuku and Sanju saw this, and immediately hugged every male member of the Zodiac. Lucy let out the golden Zodiac, too. Except for Aquarius. Except for Aquarius. There was a moment of silence.

Voldemort became mad that he was no longer the center of attention, cuz he's a baby brat, and cast a spell that he didn't know what would do, just knew that it would do something. Edward made a shield for Him, Roy, and Roy's crew, and Kuro just hid in the coffin, along with the twins, but it hit everyone else, and they found… It made them ten years older. Except for the immortal people.

"Whoo!" America exclaimed. "High five for immortality! You got old, but we're unaffected!"

"I wouldn't be so sure…" Sai pointed out.

America looked around and saw that all the nations, excluding Estonia, had reverted to their Nyo! forms.

Havoc, Jiraiya's ghost, Sen, and Happosai simultaneously started nosebleeding and yelled in perfect harmony, "I LOVE BOOBS!" and began embroidering a flag with those very words.

Madeline started crying, and Ranma patted her shoulder. "I feel your pain."

Elsewhere, the spell had affected other immortals, but differently. The Homunculi had turned into kittens (And damn, dey were cute!), the Royal Pony sister's now had gravity reversed for them, and the Doctor was a chibi. Like he was animated and everything.

England was tired of this crap. First things first. She took grabbed a piece of paper, cut chunks out of it at random, drew a squiggly line, and shoved it in Death the Kid's face. "Who has done this!?" Death the Kid screamed in rage. "It has no symmetry!"

"Dat little boy…" she pointed to Moldy.

Yelling with hatred, Death the Kid mercilessly attacked him with pudding.

England patted herself on the back for a job well done. She still had something else, though. "Alright, whoever is responsible for this mess, show yourself!"

RussianMochi descended from the sky. "Who has disturbed me from my slumber?"

"Liar, you were up for the past hour looking at a blank piece of paper."

"I was drawing snow! But now, I am flying!"

"No you ain't, bastardo," Lovina snarled. She grabbed the levitating scissors of power, and cut the rope that was keeping her aloft.

"Ow."

Shampoo bound her up, using chocolate Chow Mein.

"Now," England asked, businesslike, "how do we stop this mess? I want to be a guy again!"

"But your eyebrows are smaller," RussianMochi pointed out.

"DOESN'T MATTER! TURN US BACK!"

"Ha! I'll never tell!"

England nodded to Maddie. "You know what to do." Maddie dispensed ear muffs to everyone, and pulled Justin Bieber out of thin air. He opened his mouth…

"NOOOO! I'll tell you!"

They strapped some dynamite to Bieber, poured nitroglycerin on him, shoved a couple of England's scones down his throat, and then tossed him into a canyon with a horde of crocodiles at the bottom for good measure. They immediately regretted it. Those poor crocodiles…

Anyway, back at Hogwarts… "So how do we get everything under control?"

"The answer is simple. Gummy worms!" she said.

"Wut chu sayin', girl?" dat committee of da swag asked.

"My sibs and I figured it out. Gummy worms neutralize magical powers. So just get some gummy worms, and den dis madhouse goes back to normal!" she explained.

So everyone had to go to Rite-Aid in a shopping cart. They had a big contest with who could get there first. Charlie Brown and Maddie teamed up, and they won. **(Sorry, I just feel so much pity for these two.) **The Cat in the Hat and Coraline got second.

Of course, when they got to Rite-Aid, everyone wanted to add another candy bar/chips/soda/greeting card etc. So they put it all on Voldy's credit card. It was $894 in American dollars total, plus tax.

Back up the hill to Hogwarts was much harder than down the hill to the Rite-Aid, so they rented some golf carts, also on Moldy's tab.

Since they could only rent it for one night, they decided to throw a little party where Nagisa caught Celty and Shinra kissing when Celty thought nobody was looking. Well, as much kissing as you can do without a head. Everybody screamed like fangirls, while Celty punched Shinra in the stomach.

"Wait a sec," Mortvold interrupted. "How come you rented a golf cart?! YOU HAVE A HORSE!"

Leo Valdez ran over him on a Segway, and the party continued. Eventually, everyone was pretty tired, and thought that it might be nice to get back to their homes.

They scattered the Gummy Worms and all the effects of that magic spell disappeared. But they were still at Hogwarts.

"Why aren't we home!?" Kyo yelled at RussianMochi, who cowered.

"Sillies. You just need to spin the wheel of Cotton speakers," pointing to said wheel. "Goodbye!" She turned into an Emerald Bull dragon and flew off into the night where she was never heard from again.

They spun it. And were back home. The end.

**Well, that was pure crack. If you enjoyed it, please tell me, cuz I sure enjoyed writing it.**

**I've never seen Soul Eater, but I plan to. All I know is that DtK hates asymmetry.**

**I tried my best not to make this Mary Sue.**

**Actually, one time my siblings and I made some really stupid stories while we were on a long car ride, and mine was how Dracula now works at a toll booth because a fat girl force-fed him a cupcake with gummy worms on it, and he lost all his magic.**


End file.
